Tuesday, March 12, 2013

Intervention: Quit Being A Jerk On The Elevator

I swore to myself when I discovered the express elevator trick that I would only use it as WikiHow instructed: for a good reason.

But I can't help myself.
The express elevator trick is pressing a combination of buttons when you enter the elevator that lets you go directly to the floor you need, without having to stop at every freakin' floor on the way.

Being on an express elevator is just so gloriously wonderful that I want to use it ALL THE TIME!

It started as a way to shoot up to the top floor, just if I'm running late.

Then it became a way to pick up mail in the lobby, without leaving my desk for too long. (It's not for my convenience. It's for my coworkers. It's for the good of the company!)

But now I use it to get to the snack machine faster. I use it to avoid awkward elevator conversation. I use it to bypass all the people on floors 2 - 23 who are also trying to leave work at exactly 5:30 PM, crowding my elevator and forcing an 8-second stop at every single freakin' floor when I just want to get to my car and sit in traffic already!

So, yes, I'm out of control. I am misusing this wonderful gift of the express elevator override.

I need some kind of NFP program for express elevators (and Facebook and cheddar cheese popcorn), something that can help me enjoy the opportunity presented by the express elevator override, without taking it for granted, putting my own needs before others, or using it just because I've gotten used to using it.

And who knows, maybe that kind of program would be good for my marriage too...

Or maybe it wouldn't.

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